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If Screwtape Letters were for Parents on Sunday

My Dear Wormwood, this is probably your most important task in our future success: creating doubt, self-consciousness, and frustration in the parents of young children on Sunday morning

This sometimes takes some preparation-perhaps you can prey on their rest and make Saturday night a night of more wakings with the children so as to tire the parent's spirits. Once Sunday morning hits, they will be weary-another perfect time for the children to whine about silly things. Make it an atmosphere of many irritations-from the children refusing breakfast, to spilling on their church clothes, causing them to run late and be in a rush.

If the parents can bicker at each other that is even better. If there is a football game during the Mass time the family is trying to attend-feed thoughts into the parents that skipping Mass won't do them any harm, maybe they will not go-what a success if they do not go!

But if they are determined, the next task is to make them preoccupied with annoyances-enough annoyances that they question what they are doing by going to Mass. Make them feel empty, drained, embarrassed. Distract them from the truth that they are receiving graces just by attending-we don't want them to know this. We want them to base their decision to attend Mass off of their "feelings". Do anything you can to make them "feel" like they got nothing out of the Mass and it’s worthless.

Prey on another irritated parishioner-so that hopefully they give the young parents a snarky look to weaken their spirits even more.

Make the children especially fussy after communion, we will be weakened if they receive communion and must fight back by convincing them to leave right away-don't dare let them speak to other families-we don't want them to feel any sense of solidarity or encouragement. We want them to leave immediately so they only remember the feelings of annoyance and emptiness.

Distract them from the graces they just received. This is your most important fight. Good luck.

-Your Affectionate Uncle Screwtape


You are doing holy work by bringing your children to Mass - never forget it!

Check out our list of helpful resources that might make it a little easier - but remember, you’re the expert on your own kids, for some these tools are a life saver, for others-less is more- do what’s working in your family!

  1. Quiet Mass Book

  2. Free Coloring Pages

  3. Catholic Coloring Books

  4. Rosary Quiet Book

  5. Saint Dolls